Thursday, October 6, 2011

Kids vs. Kids

Last week, my aunt related a story to me:

Her 6 month old was sleeping in the swing and her 2-year old was watching Dinosaur Train with a bowl of pretzels and she figured that now was a pretty good time to sneak away and take a 90-second shower.

45 seconds in, and she heard a giant crash.
She ran out to discover this:

(Baby was ok)

Anyway, it got me thinking about kids and babies and stuff.

If you were lucky, after the stork delivered you, you opened your eyes to a scene like this:
 If you were luckier, however--and I was!--your very first vista was this:
 You were a younger sibling!

 This makes growing up an adventure, because kids that age only sort their life interactions into two categories:
 Toys and Not Toys.

And babies make the BEST toys!  They make noises and move and stuff.  They're better than matches!

Like a baby chic punching a hole through its shell, this kind of stuff makes babies stronger.   If a younger-sibling baby lives past the first 3 months of it's life, that's a pretty good sign it'll live to puberty.
I myself have made a noble contribution to this theory.  When I was 3 or 4, I remember my mom's friend had come to visit with her newborn.  I think the novelty of my two younger siblings had worn off, so I was super excited to hold the thing.  I washed my hands and sat in a big chair and was pretty much ready for some great baby bonding time.
 After 3 minutes or so, the novelty wore off.
 I wanted to stop holding her, but interrupting the grown-ups did not seem like a good idea.
 So I came up with this really awesome idea!*

I'd been to the park earlier that week and remembered the slide and thought it would be a lot of fun if I could make myself a human slide!  I would put my legs at an incline and point my toes and it would be so much FUN!

*it didn't occur to me to just set the baby down.  Common sense was never my forte.

Here's how it happened in my head:

Um.  Here's how it happened in real life:

 The grown-ups weren't real happy about that.
 But it DID prove me right!  This stuff makes babies stronger.  And the baby?  She grew up just fine.

I think.  I mean, she did ask me to be her friend on facebook, so...she's mentally sound I think.  Or is she??
Anyway, the moral of this story is:  Kids, let the world be your playground.  It makes you stronger.

...Which is exactly what I told my aunt.
 (I don't think she appreciated it)


S.T. Lewis said...

Excellent! Awesome! Wonderful! Great! And other words that can't quite describe how much I enjoyed this. You do good work, my friend!

May-Day_Aura said...

LOL! Your stories always make me laugh so hard. But it's like making other kids (especially younger siblings) their "toys". I've been told I once fed my younger brother a June-bug when he was a toddler and I was about 3-4ish. When asked why I did it, I said it was funny...the baby made a funny face but otherwise seem fine so I didn't think it was a big deal. My brother turned out just fine despite being force fed the bug...I think. =) He's now a forestry major in college though, so perhaps he liked the "taste" of nature!

Kevin Keele said...

I can't stop laughing, I agree with every adjective Shane used.

Raine Countryman said...

Whenever famous people talk about having Facebooks I get the same feeling as seeing a teacher at the movies and realizing that they have a life. My word verification word is "poony" in case you were wondering....

Heather said...

I'm leaving a comment like right after Kevin did because he told me I had to see what you just posted.

As a mom (who is, might I add, a tad overprotective)this post made me laugh AND gasp in horror. Quite the odd mix of emotions. But I loved it. Especially the happy visualization picture with the rainbows.

Caitlyn said...

Ha ha! Your blogs are awesome! I almost fell out of my chair laughing! This story reminded me of my daughters. Today the older one (almost 4) grabbed the younger one (1 and 1/2) in a hug (headlock) and proceeded to fall backwards off of the chair they were sitting on, taking her little sister along for the ride. Siblings are great!

Ezra Lau said...

i love how your posts are SO FUNNY

Jim said...

I love how the little baby's curly hair fell off after going down the "slide"

Jadi said...

Ohmigosh! This was great.

As soon as I stop laughing, I might think of something more clever to say.

Loved this.

A Backwards Story said...

This post was hysterical! Thank you for sharing such amusing memories! :)

Ahhh, the life of children!

dixon.mary said...

Laughing so hard I'm crying.
You're terrific!

Julie said...

This post shows that you have experience being both a younger sibling and an older sibling! Sounds like you have the best of both worlds!

Emily said...

Siblings are so great. I love the line 'if a younger-sibling baby lives past the first 3 months of it's life, that's a pretty good sign it'll live to puberty'


Love this story and the drawings. Amazing. Thank you.

Lisa said...

bwahahahahaha!!! i love this! as always ur drawings & stories are so phantasmagorically wonderful! :D

D. Cootey said...

Simply brilliant, Heather.

Aaron Ludwig said...

Amazing. You've given me much greater insight into why my kids do what they do.
Awesome work.

Brandon said...

I love this entry and your many other insights. Glad I found your blog. I love the way story people think and see the world.

Johnson Family said...

So funny I am still laughing. Having Four children of my own (three being 4 and under) this kind of thing happens to a big be part of my life lol.

Nasan Hardcastle said...

My favorite is the little boy with his arms out -after pushing over the baby swing. -so classic.
It reminds me of so many little kids like that who's minds and bodies haven't quite connected yet.

Jonathan Lankry said...

I really love the way you tells a story :)

"TORI CAT" said...

Just found your blog and i'm an instant fan!!
Ha ha! this is brilliant!!
in fact all your little stories are!!
You have a wicked sense of humour and capture it so well in your story boards!
I have linked you to mu blog, so i will make sure to come back very soon!!
Keep up the fantastic work and keep feeding your classic imagination!!
I'll swing by again soon!
All the best,
Tori Cat.x

"TORI CAT" said...

Thanx for the comment on my blog.
Im glad ur happy to meet me and my fat hamster :P
Just noticed u have changed ur banner up the top :)
Thats freaky cool :D
i also loved the mary poppins style one too :)
Fab work dude,
I'll come back soon.
Toodle pip

Brandon said...

You are hilarious! I just read your last comment on my blog and some of your blog entries to my wife. We died laughing. I love the way you think:)

Kylee said...

I can't stop laughing! You're so talented!!!

Ann Dee said...

You are so awesome, Heather. I love it. It's spot on.

Envision Image Photography said...

Laughed so hard I cried. F'real.

Burgandy Ice said...

Oh... too, too funny. I am snorting at the computer just as I chuckled my way through Entwined. I'm a new GFC & I hope it's ok I linked back to this blog from my review!!

NaturallyCuriousRosalind said...

Every peice is a masterpeice!! you are a born story teller! brava!!

Anonymous said...

I was the youngest of four. The closest sibling to me in age is six years ahead of me, the oldest of us is nine years ahead of me. So I basically became the Toy of the family.
They played great games with me like Hide the Baby where one sibling would hide the tiny infant in different places and they others would go find it (favorite hiding places included the cereal cupboard and the dryer)
Roll the Baby where my sister and her friend put me on a bed sheet and rolled me back and forth (the friend dropped her end of the bedsheet...I'm ok though *twitch*)
yeah...i survived :D

Samuel Rex said...

That was awesome good job